Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Desperate Weather Coping Mechanisms

Okay, I'm getting desperate. It's still snowy out there and it's Day #7 (or so) that the sun's been held hostage. Other people are coping in different ways, according to the radio - one person wore a Christmas sweater to work and another person strung Christmas lights on his/her house and lit them up. It seems irony and sarcasm are the order of the day. How are you other Northern-hemisphere people coping?  Hope you're hanging in there. Me - I'm still wearing shorts at home and sewing swimsuits and swim robes for the girls. And just the other day we went out to buy even more pairs of flip-flops. Apart from all that, I've run out of other coping mechanisms and have no choice now but to write nonsense rhymes to keep my spirits up. Here's one - more melancholic than my usual and my archaic English conventions and rhyme schemes are all over the place but what's a person to do? I don't feel particularly wicked or sharp right now, just desperate.   

An ode to the coming of spring
(whenever that might be)

O wretched winter, dark and long
Thine welcome overstayeth;
Thou swalloweth the robin's song
And made a March of May-eth.

Why dost thou linger when thou shouldst
Have fled to lands Down Under,
And let the sun do all it couldst
To rend the clouds assunder?

Begone, vile snow and evil wind,
And take thy snow ploughs with thee -
Then let the blessed thaw begin,
That warmth might come, if briefly.

Alas, our skin- it cracketh
As on the winter goes -
We cough-eth and we hack-eth
And have chilblains in our toes.

Now, though the frost be nagging
There is good news to date -
That while the cold be dragging,
The pollen season's late.

Yet -allergies or bitter freeze -
If we a choice could bring
For runny nose or thund'rous sneeze,
It might as well be spring!

Pleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseplease . . . sniff.


  1. Yup. You have it bad. Thanks for the giggles, though. Every little bit helps.

    How am I coping? Working with colorful fabrics helps. Other than that, it's just forcing one foot in front of the other (which is extra difficult when it has to be outdoors). I sigh a lot, too... not that that helps anything.

  2. Oh, I know how you feel. My husband informed me at breakfast that 1-3 inches of snow is forecast for Thursday. I just want to crawl back in bed, pull the covers over my head and hibernate until spring! I'm not coping, just enduring the best I can and pressing forward. I love your Ode! Eventually the season MUST change, mustn't it?

  3. You must be a fellow Minnesotan. :) :) One word - chocolate, a lot of chocolate. :) Thanks for the poem and making me laugh. :)

  4. You can come visit Oregon where spring lasts four months.
    Direct flights from MSP to PDX.
    I'll allow you some weeding time plus moonstruck chocolates.

  5. i didn't leave the house for 3 days... we got about a foot of snow over the weekend and i convinced myself that if we all ignore it, it will go away. it didn't work. :(

  6. "made a March of May-eth"
    You made me smile today. Thank you.

  7. If it is any consolation spring may, just, perhaps, have arrived in the UK... after an Easter holiday of terrible weather, visiting relatives who have to sit around our house (back to back reading to the kids) because of the cold and wet, plus sick children, the children are now back at school and the sun has come out! (hurrah for us).

  8. Hang in there...you'll appreciate it all the more when it finally gets here. I'm in Canada (though actually geographically further south than you!) and we really don't begin to expect nice weather till the end of April.
    I have a couple of camping events in June that require lots of planning to make them go smoothly so I start that now to pass through the dark, dog days of winter. :-)

  9. You are too funny!
    -Kim in Phila.

  10. My thoughts exactly! Also I'm reminded that we still have Christmas lights hanging in our front window. Maybe I'll turn them on tonight...

  11. I am looking on it as a chance to get my summer wardrobe essentials sewn by the BEGINNING of summer instead of the end, for a change. A cardi, a dress and a couple of skirts planned, then I'll be ready for the sun.....

  12. To SNOW:

    How do I hate thee?
    Let me count the ways...
    I hate thee to the depth and breadth and width of my heart....

    Attack it with a blow-torch!!! It's driving me crazy!!!!

  13. I'm in Minnesota too and you have made me feel better (better in a misery loves company way). I'm crabby and I don't like it. I've never worn tights with shorts but I think I'm going to give that a try. -Niki

  14. I think I'll put this up on my wall

  15. I enjoyed your poem, even as we southerners enjoy weather in the high seventies and the kids play out in the yard!
    I wish you nice, warm weather soon!

  16. You poor thing. We seem to have skipped right past spring and jumped into summer, mid nineties. Scalding hot car seat season is upon us here in Phx :(


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